I’m not going to cry. For one
day. No tears.
After thinking about Christmas
and what it’s always meant—the family traditions and celebrating Christ’s birth—I
decided maybe I could do a Christmas tree after all.
Trouble is I didn’t want to put
up a big traditional tree so late. It’s a lot of work, and my energy level is
unpredictable from one moment to the next.
Perfect!
I hefted one into my shopping cart,
added a $2 strand of lights to the purchase, and headed home.
After finding something to place the tree on to give it more height, I went up into the attic and sorted through our
ornaments. I carefully selected a few that held special meaning. An angel Josh
bought me when he was about ten years old, little wooden ornaments my in-laws
bought us when Lindsay was just a baby, some from Pigeon Forge that Lindsay had
helped pick out when she was six, and a few others that would hang gently from
the small branches of our Christmas tree.
I stood back and surveyed my
work. My throat ached, and those dreaded tears threatened to spill. Then I
thought about what Lindsay would say about my abstract, nontraditional, wacky-looking
tree. My Charlie Brown tree. Although looking at it now, maybe it's one the Grinch or the Cat-in-the-Hat would've picked out. It's very Dr. Seuss-ish, wouldn't you say?
Even though she loved Cinderella as a child and still believed in fairy tales, Lindsay had
grown to be a minimalist. I could hear her saying, “It’s perfect, Mom. I
like it.”
Her laugh filled my mind, and I
smiled.
And my pact?
Well, a few tears did fall, but
they didn’t just reflect my sorrow.
I choose to celebrate the joy of
my Savior’s birth and the joy of having a beautiful daughter, even if it was only
for thirty-three years. I savor the memories of her child-like approach to
Christmas each year and how, in the end, she chose to see joy in simple things.
Boy, do I miss her.
Laura
©Laura Hodges Poole
I love your tree, Laura, but your attitude even more. May God's peace surround you moment by moment.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Kathleen. God bless you and your family this Christmas.
DeleteIt's beautiful, Laura. All of it.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Dawn. God bless you.
DeleteI love the tree. Laura! It truly is perfect.
ReplyDeleteI'm thankful for your happy tears!